I went through a little bit of time that I fell into sin. The more I committed this sin, the more condemnation and guilt I felt. It was like quicksand that I could not get free from. It seemed like the more I tried to stop hurting myself this way, the more I was craving to do it.
I knew I was doing wrong and I found myself in a terrible place of concentrating my relationship with the Father through the dirty lense of how I saw myself. I can testify that I was like the prodigal son, who was bathing in unrighteous thoughts and eating with the unclean pigs.
One morning when I was right in the middle of sin, I was taken into an encounter with the Father. Before the Father began talking to me, He was grinning from ear to ear and He said over and over, “It’s all about Jesus!”. He showed me a mirror on the wall of how He saw me. When I looked into the mirror, my hair was perfect and I was shimmering in so much beauty. Then He told me, “I would like to talk to you later”.
After that happened, the Father showed me a faucet that was pouring out all of His blessings and promises of abundant provisions. Anytime that I got close to the faucet and put my name near the faucet, the water would completely stop. Then the Holy Spirit began to teach me that I had been focusing on myself to be worthy, instead of focusing on Jesus and the gift of Righteousness that He has given.
Righteousness is the nature of God and it is a gift that cannot be earned, it is the Divine nature of God. As we access by faith, we are pure and perfect like Jesus. Putting on our garments of righteous thinking also gives us the boldness to access the grace of answered prayers,
“Therefore let us [with privilege] approach the throne of grace [that is, the throne of God’s gracious favor] with confidence and without fear, so that we may receive mercy [for our failures] and find [His amazing] grace to help in time of need [an appropriate blessing, coming just at the right moment]” Hebrews 4:16
As I understood and acted as the Righteousness of God through Christ Jesus, then I no longer was attracted to the sin. I was so overwhelmed with God’s love that the sin was no longer appealing. When we pray from the place of being worthy because of Jesus, our prayers are answered because we are no longer fearful of punishment. It is that beautiful place of Grace. Yet whenever I prayed from a place of being conscious of my sins, I felt unworthy and I was no longer under the grace of His righteousness.
The Father was showing me that as we stand under the waterfall of His love and righteousness, the blessings pour out in an abundance. I keep remembering that faucet of God that was pouring and it was not a delicate trickle of blessings, but it was a forceful and strong flow that flowed through Jesus. My hope now is to no longer turn that faucet off but to remember how the Father sees me in that mirror. In His eyes, we are spotless and adorned in His love. It’s all about Jesus!
Blessings, and love,
Tell your sins to each other. And pray for each other so you may be healed. The prayer from the heart of a man right with God has much power. James 5:16 NLV