I was in bed several nights ago, minding my own business and the Lord said to me “Your testimony is your dominance”. It was completely out of the left field and I had no clue what He was talking about. However, shortly after that, I started to hear about an attack on the testimony that He is writing for me through this journey.
At first, it hurt, because I did not choose this, especially having to be open about my life in such a vulnerable way. It would have been so much easier to choose a different path or not to open my heart online to anyone who wants to read it. However, the Lord knows the barriers that I am crossing over both for myself and generationally. He has a reason and my job is to trust.
I will note that God has been very good to us! The only suffering that I have had has been in my emotions as I overcome the fear and generational strongholds. My teenage kids have been pampered by the Lord so well, that they did not even notice the pain or tears, as I learn to trust Jesus and allow His Word to become me.
I had to come back to the altar and lay my life down at the feet of Jesus again and choose to trust His plan, even if it meant the whole world misunderstood me. I had to decide that His words were more valuable to me than the approval and judgment of man.
What most people who read this blog do not understand is that there is more behind this journey that reaches deep into a book that the Lord has been writing with me. It is a forerunner book that taps into a revelation that the Holy Spirit has given to me that has never been known before. I am still in awe that He would choose someone like me, with all of these issues to be the carrier of something so profound and unveiling.
It is also reassuring to know that even the attack is a blessing because it always means an increase is coming.. Being persecuted means that a Spirit of Glory and of God is resting on me and I can rest in His goodness to be my faithful friend.
So my defense is no defense. I will not be debating the path that Jesus has chosen for us. Jesus is My Hero to defend me. Every person has a very unique plan and it is always best to keep our eyes on Jesus and trust His plan and not man’s understanding. It all comes down to the intimate dance with Jesus, as the living presence of His word transforms the soul to look like His.
At the end of this dance, I will stand taller being fearless, confident and full of faith. To those who are displeased with my testimony, then my suggestion is that you no longer read it. Or just wait until later to buy the book, then looking back it will all make sense. To those who God has drawn close to read these stories, I am very excited to tell you that it is only going to get better. You have helped me so much through this with your love and friendship.
Lots of hugs and gratitude!
When I needed the Lord, I looked for Him;
I called out to Him, and He heard me and responded.
He came and rescued me from everything that made me so afraid.
Look to Him and shine,
so shame will never contort your faces.
This poor soul cried, and the Eternal heard me.
He rescued me from my troubles.
The messenger of the Eternal God surrounds
everyone who walks with Him and is always there to protect and rescue us.
Taste of His goodness; see how wonderful the Eternal truly is.
Anyone who puts trust in Him will be blessed and comforted.